But anyway, yes I am extremely unmotivated for my birthday at the current time. I suppose that as it gets closer to the actual date I might get that little bit more excited. I don't know though, at the moment I'm just holding out for Mum to get home already. I thought I'd be alright when she left, but then she put off coming home for another 3 weeks to deal with this defensive driving course that she's setting up with some race car driver for over there. That broke me a little. It also made me realise how much I actually rely on my mother, despite my age. As a result I'm going to try and become a little more independent from my parents.
I'm getting there slowly. I'm arranging to go back to college to finish my clinic hours instead of continuing to do them externally, cause in reality, I'm just not doing them. I've also started working on things that I've always wanted to do. Like I spent an hour or so tonight researching piano tutors on the internet. I have seriously always wanted to learn piano, but I also knew that if I attempted to teach myself, then it would go the same way that all things go when I don't push myself, and I'd never do it. There are quite a few places around where I live, I now just have to decide how much I'm willing to pay as well as how far I'm willing to travel.
Speaking of travel, once I finally sort out my freaking finances, that's the next stage. Saving up to go on holidays. I'm hoping to go on a cruise in a couple of years, as well as eventually go to Japan. But more short term is maybe taking a trip to New Zealand to see family and friends that I have over there and haven't seen in ages, as well as my own trip to Norfolk Island.
I love Norfolk. I seriously do. Everything there is so slow-paced. It's wonderful. It's a beautiful island with friendly people, and you get an amazing sense of community and peace there as everyone knows everyone. I remember when I was smaller going there and never having to worry about shoes as there are no poisonous animals there (even the spiders are harmless!), and you never have to worry about seatbelts cause the speed limit is never over 40 (you still don't, cause it still isn't!) haha. I also remember getting lost in the main shopping village area with my brother, and all we did was go to the park cause we had every faith that Mum or someone else we knew would eventually find us (someone we knew finding us wasn't impossible, cause like I said, everyone knows everyone).
It's been, well, quite a few years. I think it was either at the end of year 11 or year 12 that I went there last. I really miss it. My grandmother and the side of the family that I'm actually close to live there, and I miss them every single day. My grandma is one spunky lady let me tell you. She's out there on her property at her age (50/60-something, I forget) with a freaking chainsaw cutting down trees that she needs to etc. She's one amazing woman and I would love to grow old and be just like her.
I'm listening to nice, soothing music at the moment. "Baker Baker" by Tori Amos was just on. I love her. Seriously. If I was lesbian I'd be all over her. Hell I'd be all over her now ;P I've been introduced to so many new artists in the past month or so, like Sia, The Academy Is..., Placebo, Mumford & Sons, and my particular favourite of the moment: Anberlin.
I have heard of these artists before, but I never really thought that I'd be into them previously, just by the names of them. Shows that I should really never ever take a guess depending on a band/artist's name, cause they just might surprise me =] In all fairness I ignored them in the past because the feel of their names was that some of them were screamo bands, and I'm really not a fan of screamo haha. Oh Enigma how I love you (one of their songs just came on).
Enigma is probably my favourite 'massage music' band apart from Enya. They are just amazing. I love their song 'Gravity of Love'. Sarah Brightman (lucky bitch got Phantom of the Opera written for her!) is also another favourite to chill out to. Nowadays I'll pretty much listen to anything that suits my mood. I think that's why I song flick all the time, cause I try to find the song that suits my current mood, and when you have over 2000 songs and you don't really know what you want, it can take a while to find that song.
I've been feeling extra tired lately. Probably another side effect of waiting for my mother to come back, but because of it I'm really becoming rather lazy. And yet despite it all, I still wake up fairly early, and my body clock always, without fail wakes me up itself after giving me 8.5 hours of sleep (providing I don't wake myself up earlier first). I really think I should get my vitamin levels checked cause a naturopathic friend said that lacking in vitamins and general ill health can cause constant fatigue. And in all fairness, I haven't been the healthiest person lately. I think the healthiest I've been was when I had tuna for lunch last Friday XD
This song is making me think of Paul and I. 'You' by Evanescence. As far as I'm aware it's not on any of their albums. I stumbled across it by accident on YouTube once, when I was watching music videos of Final Fantasy scouring for ideas.
I'm really struggling to get back into movie making you know. I think I need to set aside half an hour each day that becomes 'Moni time' so that I can just do things like get back into making AMVs and playing around with Photoshop, because I actually really enjoy doing those things. I'm not artistic in the general sense of paper/canvas and pencils/paint, but give me a mouse, a keyboard, some video clips and a song, and you'd be surprised what I can actually do.
http://www.youtube.com/user/oOpotatoesforeverOo
That's my YouTube user account homepage. That Tae Kwon Do video, was actually played at a demonstration last year, and I've been approached to put it onto DVDs for some of the higher ups. It's one of my simpler works, but I still love it in it's simplicity.
I'm actually making one at the moment to Regina Spektor's 'The Call'. Although I'm having a bit of trouble deciding whether I want it to be a single anime, or a mixture. The way I'm going at the moment though, I think I might use 'D.N. Angel' and 'Strawberry Panic!' as the two mains, with maybe a little bit of Final Fantasy X-2 thrown in for good measure. I need an idea for what to do after I eventually finish this one though. Whether I keep making them or I stop for another year haha.
Gosh I can ramble can't I? And I don't think that I've even really talked about anything in particular. Like seriously, how did I get from talking about the song 'You' and how it reminded me of Paul & I, to AMV making? My train of thought is really random at times.
We got new uniforms at work! They're so much better than our old ones, cause for one they're not white, so they won't show stains so much (ink stains etc). Plus they're so much more comfortable. And I don't have to worry about tucking my shirt in anymore thank god.
Anyway, I have a date with the lovely Callum on the 12th. A night of Disney movies and of course Disney singstar if we don't feel too Disney'd out afterwards :P I miss having crazy adventures with him. He's so much fun, he and I need to have more park based adventures like the night we first met, walking around the park singing songs together and getting muddy (he fell over in it, so naturally he covered me in it when I helped him up XD).
Anywho, bed time! I'm so over work for this week already, but it has to be done. Payday in two days hurrah.
xx